Insomnia

Quite often (especially tonight) I find that I have a particularly annoying case of insomnia. This is something that I can't stand, and the frequency of this problem has made me come up with a method that sometimes helps, and is good for self-confidence and a positive feeling before drifting into the subconscious.

Now, when you're lying in the dark trying to fall asleep, you're in a sort of twilight area between waking and sleeping. This releases inhibitions and makes dreams seem closer to reality. (This state is also present in the minute or so when you're just waking up, but we are often in a hurry in the morning, in which case no use can be extracted from this pleasant frame of mind.)

Getting to the point: find the most comfortable position possible and imagine the most unreasonable thing that you want to have more than anything else. (For instance your own island or a particular person.) Then imagine a situation in which the object (or whatever it happens to be) is present, and imagine what you are doing, as if you were watching yourself in a movie, or acting in the movie. (For example imagine yourself flying an airplane or whatever you want to do that seems too outrageous in waking hours.)

This should make you feel contented, and will perhaps even extend into your dreams and put you in a good mood when you wake up. A feeling of confidence and like you can do anything is best possible long-term result and will allow you to swan through your day calmly and elegantly as long as you keep your inner potential in mind.

Remember: missing half of the day is an unpleasant scenario in which you feel left out of the world.

Also: you should consider the classic issue of beauty sleep. (This is not a myth, so don't think that you can get around it with a delicious latte macchiato in the morning - though this does help a lot, it is not a substitute for sleep.)

Romance: possibly over-romanticized?

To be honest, we've all had the same romantic fantasy: to jet of to a five-star hotel on a tropical island or in a European city with somebody resembling George Clooney.

But let's face it, ladies: the chances of something like this actually happening are very slim. (Sorry, but somebody had to say it!)

The realization of this cruel fact is what makes a lot of women begin to behave desperately, which in turn further decreases their chances of landing a good one. (Yes, it is like fishing - I've never actually attempted the sport myself, but I think it's safe to say that it's a good comparison.)
The saddest thing is that these are, for the most part, fabulous women.
So keep in mind: avoid this behavior at all costs! (This tidbit is nothing new. Any magazine could tell you as much.)

Adopt a casual attitude when dealing with the whole process.
Make sure you remember these two things:
1. You are fine on your own. Independence is the best quality to have in life, in any situation.
2. Listen to the ever-wise Coco Chanel, who said: 'As long as you know that men are like children, you know everything!'

Stop waiting for It, and It will eventually come to you.
It will hit you when you least expect it.
(And pretending to stop will not work, so no cheating!)

Who knows? When you least expect it, you may end up in the most cliché and passionate romance you could ever imagine!
(And I don't mean just the little things, I mean possibly going as far as chance encounters, romantic locations and long-stemmed red roses.)

Incidentally, this is what happened to me - though a week or so will never qualify as more than a summer fling, it's still something.
Which brings me to my next point: do not be afraid of something sort-term. It may not be the ideal situation, but sometimes, it can be just right. To quote the song 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' would not be enough to explain this, but it's the essence of the idea. Us women deserve to indulge, whether it involves chocolate, a maxed-out credit card or a man. (Though never try to turn a fling into something more than it really is. This can end in a spectacular fiasco.)

Never forget: when dealing with a man, always keep the upper hand. When your head is lost, all is lost.

A final tip: do not wallow in your failures. Listen to the immortal song by Edith Piaf: 'Non, je ne regrette rien' (which translates as no, I do not regret anything).

À la Française

To charm all of the service personnel while out...

Something that sometimes irritates me about France is the unnecessary chatter in stores and cafés that holds up the line.
However, this is actually a very pleasant part of French life. (As long as you're in the mood.)

The ability to easily charm any waiter/waitress in a restaurant is something that les français are experts at. Not only will this ensure you better service (we all know how irritating it can be to have to endure rude service if we're staying somewhere for any extended period of time) but it will give you a certain grace and charm in the eyes of the people around you. (This can never hurt.)

The technique is easy: simply be charming, chatty and pleasant.

To pick up a day

Today, my best friend let me know that she wasn't feeling as good as she usually does, and asked for advice about how to fix it.

To be honest, I didn't really know what to say - it depends on where you are, who you're with and what's available to you.

Key to success: be resourceful. If you're on the beach, go swimming and show off your bathing suit while tanning. If you're in town, go to a café and order a nice, big latte. If you're in a hotel, look in the direction of the mini-bar (or downstairs bar). If you're at home, watch your favorite movie and/or take a bubble bath.

Indulgence: for extreme situations, let yourself spend money. Get a massage or a facial or something of the sort. Or give in to the basic female impulse and go shopping. (Do not, however, do something you'll regret. This will only make things worse later on, after the novelty wears off.)

Fail-safe: diamonds are, as we all know, a girl's best friend. But only one of two. The other is chocolate. Using chocolate as an anti-depressant may sound like a cliché, but here is a deviation from the usual: instead of stuffing an entire bar of supermarket chocolate in your mouth, go to nice shop that sells really good truffles and only buy a couple. (This is something that is nicely accompanied by champagne, if the opportunity arises.) However, if you can afford to buy diamonds every time you're a little down, by all means go ahead and do so! (Or take Marilyn Monroe's suggestion and find a millionaire to buy them for you.)

Music: turn off your phone, turn up the volume and dance it out. The adrenaline rush will make you feel happier. (Possibly something to do with endorphins or the like.) Do not let a sad/slow song come on, though - this will make things a lot worse.

Essential: talk to your friends. Spend some time with your girls, and I guarantee that you'll feel better. Even if it's one of those 'I want to be alone' things, just a text message, email or two-minute phone-call will be enough. 'I feel blue' (or something of the sort) always draws sympathy from your closest friends, and they'll be more than happy to offer reassurance (subtle or direct). And if you're exaggerating and being a drama-queen (for reasons period-related or otherwise) they will instantly knock some sense into you.

Do whatever you can to make yourself feel confident and beautiful.

Dealing with inelegance

I am currently visiting a small town filled with people who are decidedly unsophisticated. (With several exceptions, as always, bien sur.)

But how to deal with this dilemma?

I admit, the simple solution of donning my sunglasses when I go out just doesn't seem to suffice. So I simply take it up a notch: putting on my best things and throwing on some simple yet classy makeup.

To best differentiate yourself from a lack of elegance, you should apply the immortal principal of Mademoiselle Chanel: the art of beauty lies in simplicity. Black and white is always classic and classy, so it allows you to rise above the irritations and inferior entities of the world around you.

To sum up: black and white is the key to simple elegance. To deal with lack of sophistication, go back to the basics.

A modification: when it comes to makeup and/or accessories, add a little red to stand out from the rest of the ensemble.

Remember: do not be a snob, and do not be obvious about exhasperation. This is arrogant and pretentious. Be suble: maybe exhale a little just loudly enough to hear. (But do not roll your eyes and say alala in a stage whisper.)

the Essence of Living

There are always those days that are just la merde and you have to deal with people and situations that are somewhat beneath you.

So just put on big black sunglasses and deal with it...